Zach the Rat
The word floating through my mind today is intention. Our pet rat Zach died yesterday. Zach was a Christmas present from my sister to one of our kiddos 2 ½ years ago. (And yes, dear sister who just had her first baby, we are already planning ahead for the pet gifts we get to bestow upon you in the years to come!)
Zach creates a Ratatouille moment by serenading us on Valentine's Day.
We knew the time was coming, but it’s never fun to lose a pet. I’ll admit, he was really stinky so I was not too terribly sad this time. Heartless I know.
The events of yesterday remind me of a time a few years ago. Let me tell you about Ninja the hamster.
I rarely had to think about Ninja. He lived in my 9 year old son’s room and was dutifully fed and cared for without fail. During a particularly hectic week, I was told that Ninja had one bowl of food left, and was asked to pick up a new bag at the store. I had been to the store several times throughout the week and each time intended to get the food, but each time I forgot.
The events of yesterday remind me of a time a few years ago. Let me tell you about Ninja the hamster.
I rarely had to think about Ninja. He lived in my 9 year old son’s room and was dutifully fed and cared for without fail. During a particularly hectic week, I was told that Ninja had one bowl of food left, and was asked to pick up a new bag at the store. I had been to the store several times throughout the week and each time intended to get the food, but each time I forgot.
Zach with our Golden. Odd friends for sure.
I’d remember as I walked in the door, checked on Ninja and made sure he still had food. He did, and I promised to get it next time. This pattern carried on until Saturday night. Finally, I ran back to the store at 11:30 p.m. to get the food. All was well. Ninja had been running on his wheel and the kids had played with him during the evening.
Unfortunately, I got distracted. Instead of feeding Ninja, I put the food on the counter and went to bed.
The next morning, my son went to feed Ninja but came running back downstairs with tears in his eyes and Ninja in his hands. “We were one day too late, Mom. Ninja died and it was my fault.”
Unfortunately, I got distracted. Instead of feeding Ninja, I put the food on the counter and went to bed.
The next morning, my son went to feed Ninja but came running back downstairs with tears in his eyes and Ninja in his hands. “We were one day too late, Mom. Ninja died and it was my fault.”
Immediately, I said, “What!? I know he had some food left. I had been checking each day.”
“No, Mom he didn’t have any food.”
To which I replied, “I am sure he had some. I kept checking.” The evidence of the dead hamster wasn’t enough for me. We ran up to the bedroom to check the food bowl and sure enough it was empty. It must have been empty for days. I’d made a mistake.
We were crushed. We sat and cried together, and my little guy said, “It’s all my fault. I have gotten so busy this week that I didn’t notice he was so hungry. I forgot to take care of him and now he’s dead. I just want a second chance. I will do so much better.” My son was willing to accept the responsibility.
I felt terrible. It wasn’t his mistake, but mine. In this moment, my greatest intentions were not enough. I had the food that could have saved the hamster, but I didn’t follow through. My heart was full of goodness. I wanted him to be ok, but I did not do my part.
Am I doing my part in our family? It’s a good question to ask. I don’t mean are you running around crazy trying to do everything. My guess is that you are, just like I was that week. But stop for just a minute and consider your foundational relationships. Are they getting the attention they deserve?
I do my best, but sometimes if it’s hard or inconvenient, I let things slide and excuse myself; promising that tomorrow will be the day. There comes a time though when I have to take action.
Like my son, “I just wanted a second chance.” That chance comes when I choose to accept responsibility and create change. When I choose to stay present and feel gratitude in each small moment—even the really hard ones.
I am strong enough. I can ask for help when I need it. I can’t always do it on my own, but I don’t have to. You don’t have to either. I’m here cheering you on. Others are cheering you on too. What do you feel to act on today? What change needs to enter your life? What will bring you closer to the people you love?
Choose one thing today.
“No, Mom he didn’t have any food.”
To which I replied, “I am sure he had some. I kept checking.” The evidence of the dead hamster wasn’t enough for me. We ran up to the bedroom to check the food bowl and sure enough it was empty. It must have been empty for days. I’d made a mistake.
We were crushed. We sat and cried together, and my little guy said, “It’s all my fault. I have gotten so busy this week that I didn’t notice he was so hungry. I forgot to take care of him and now he’s dead. I just want a second chance. I will do so much better.” My son was willing to accept the responsibility.
I felt terrible. It wasn’t his mistake, but mine. In this moment, my greatest intentions were not enough. I had the food that could have saved the hamster, but I didn’t follow through. My heart was full of goodness. I wanted him to be ok, but I did not do my part.
Am I doing my part in our family? It’s a good question to ask. I don’t mean are you running around crazy trying to do everything. My guess is that you are, just like I was that week. But stop for just a minute and consider your foundational relationships. Are they getting the attention they deserve?
I do my best, but sometimes if it’s hard or inconvenient, I let things slide and excuse myself; promising that tomorrow will be the day. There comes a time though when I have to take action.
Like my son, “I just wanted a second chance.” That chance comes when I choose to accept responsibility and create change. When I choose to stay present and feel gratitude in each small moment—even the really hard ones.
I am strong enough. I can ask for help when I need it. I can’t always do it on my own, but I don’t have to. You don’t have to either. I’m here cheering you on. Others are cheering you on too. What do you feel to act on today? What change needs to enter your life? What will bring you closer to the people you love?
Choose one thing today.
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