Today is serious business.  Despite all my blog posts about family travel, I was more than a little hesitant about our 14 drive to the Yellowstone region.  So much so that I almost cancelled our trip.  Fortunately, I had some friends who walked me through some thoughts on our itinerary, we made some adjustments, and I felt excited for the adventure again.  I knew we needed a good audiobook.  My kids keep up on the more popular book series so we were in need of some fresh ideas.  I turned to fellow mothers and readers on Facebook and was so excited with the response I received. 

Whether it’s for listening in the car, reading together as a family, or for a child to read on their own, here are the top recommendations we received for kids ages 10-16.  Now I have not listened to every single one of these titles.  Please—that’s a lot of listening, but each of these comes highly recommended.  I didn’t want to keep this list to myself.  Enjoy!  Thank  you to Facebook friends who shared your wisdom to create this list!  

If you are looking for a more specific age range or wonder about language, violence, or sexual content, check out commonsensemedia.org.  They not only review the book, but rate it based on specific content.  When we are looking to please a variety of ages, this is a tool I love.

Sideways Stories from Wayside School – Louis Sachar

Leven Thumps – Obert Skye

Hitchhikers guide to the Galaxy – Douglas Adams

Little Britches – Ralph Moody

Laddie – Gene Stratton-Porter

Carry on Mr. Bowditch – Jean Lee Latham

To Kill a Mockingbird – Harper Lee

Treasure Island - Robert Louis Stevenson

Code Talker – Jospeh Bruchac

The Three Musketeers – Alexandre Dumas

The Work and the Glory – Gerald N. Lund

Fablehaven – Brandon Mull

Beyonders – Brandon Mull

Harry Potter – JK Rowling

Chicken in the Headlights – Matthew Buckley

Bullies in the Headlights – Matthew Buckley

Janitors – Tyler Whitesides

Tennis Shoes Among the Nephites Series - Chris Heimerdinger

The Gravity Keeper – Simon Bloom

Candy Shop Wars – Brandon Mull

The Rithmatist – Brandon Sanderson

The Ascendance Trilogy – Jennifer Nielsen

The Boy Who Harnessed the Wind – Kamkwamba

Unbroken – Laura Hillenbrand YA version

Percy Jackson and related Rick Riordan titles

The Enchanted Collection (Audible)

The Adventure Collection (Audible)

The Graveyard Book – Neil Gaiman

Nick of Time Series – Ted Bell

Incident at Hawk’s Hill – Allan W Eckert

Brighty of the Grand Canyon- Marguerite Henry

Cheaper by the Dozen - Frank B. Gilbreth and Ernestine Gilbreth Carey

Charlie Bone Series – Jenny Nimmo

Magyk series – Angie Sage

Chronicles of Narnia - C. S. Lewis

Sweetness at the Bottom of my Pie – Alan Bradley

This week has been one where things I know in my brain really hit my heart with a new depth of understanding. 

 I wouldn’t call myself a worrier, but deep beneath the surface it’s there… percolating. Our families have a lot working against them and it’s hard not knowing what lies ahead.  Have I taught my children enough?  Are they really listening?  Do they deeply value our opinions?  Will they stay free from addictions?  Will they make choices that bring them true joy?  For me, facing the unknown is one of the hardest things in life.   I really don’t like it.  Let’s be real.  Sometimes I just want to know that this story of our life has a happy ending.  And if I had my way, I would write a great story. 

Even harder than not knowing the ending to this story is knowing that I only get to write a part of it.  Only 1/6 to be exact!  I hate it!  And I love it!  I hate it because it’s hard, it hurts, and I can’t control it. 

I love it because the freedom of choice is at the core of our experiences in this life.  Allowing choice acknowledges mistakes, embraces pain, and requires a deep level of acceptance and trust.  It also brings strength, passion, energy, and purpose to our experiences. 

With every choice, I write my own story.  Our stories are messy and full of imperfection, and the only way to travel through the unknown is to trust. 

 What do you trust in?  I trust in God.  I trust that He knows who I am and that He is watching over me.  I trust that He has a plan for me and that it’s a good plan; even when I can’t see a clear path.  I trust that He also knows my children.  He loves them even more than I do.  Which is good.

Good because each of my children are busy writing their own story.  The story I can’t control.  All of my worry and fuss will never change the fact that this is their story too.  Yes, I play a role.  The role I try desperately to fill is that of a mother.  I love.  I teach. I show up.  I embrace them in their yuckiest moments for all they bring and for who they are becoming.  I set aside my own fear and sit with them in the mess. I let them know that mistakes are a part of the journey and there is no shame in living and learning.  I listen.  I ask what they are learning.  I STOP telling them what they need to figure out.  I learn from their wisdom.  I offer support and guidance.  I feel their heart, see their dreams, and trust in their path.  And, then I forget all these things.  I start to worry again and try to grasp for control.  Then, I remember and I write so I can remember. 

So I have a choice.  Do I cling to fear and control?  Do I step into trust and belief?

Today I choose trust.  When we believe in our children and champion their efforts, we empower them to take charge and write their own messy story full of growth and experience.  What do you choose?

Each summer our kids offer a neighborhood kids camp.  It’s a lot of work.  They plan daily activities and crafts, we shop together, prepare supplies, and then open the doors for a whole lot of summer chaos and fun.  My kids love it and look forward to it every year.  And, every year I get to learn the same lesson over and over again.

Despite my inner commitment to let our kids fully own the experience, it’s easy for me to step in.  I begin small by trying to control the chaos and mess, and I’m pretty good at it! But then, I start seeing more areas for improvement or efficiency so I start to help more.  Unfortunately, something else happens too.  I unwittingly send the message that despite their great efforts, they are not enough.  My kids step back,  the excitement in their eyes diminishes and suddenly I am dragging them along trying to get them to help more.  I end up exhausted, frustrated and wonder why I even agreed to this plan in the first place.

Then I remember, some years sooner than others, “Oh ya!  This is not my camp.  It’s Cox Kids Summer Camp—run by the Cox kids; not this Cox mom!  They have been taught, we’ve practiced, and they are ready for this.  So I slam on the brakes and regroup.  I shift to the role of advisor and support/safety crew.  I step back and get to watch the magic happen.  

The kids step into their leadership role and take ownership in the project again.  As they realize that someone better run the show, my pleas for help disappear and they are up and moving:  organizing, giving directions, interacting with their campers, finding creative solutions, leading games, and creating learning experiences for everyone.  Including me.  

I get to humbly experience my children in a new light as they grow more fully and become the wonderful beings they are.  Fun, full of life, messy, and creative kids with big hearts who love their campers!  And who get to practice cleaning up!  This hard work experience connects us.  I believe when we prepare our children and create opportunities for them to practice sharing ownership, we instill trust and promote growth.  It’s a beautiful connection to invite.   
 
What areas in your family need a little less you and a little more kids this week?  Pick one—just a small one.  Make sure it’s age appropriate!  Then, spend some time teaching, practicing, and getting ready to take a step back.  Bit by bit, the pieces will come together as you give the gift of becoming.